A restless night. Insomnia is one of the curses of my condition! Some nights I just lie there and give my body a rest. At other times I get up and try and use the time. Upon waking I often recognise immediately if I am not going to get back to sleep. It is an undescribable physical sensation - at least, I have failed to find words to describe it, anyway.
I think that this night's slumber was interrupted due to discomfort in my stomach (griping pains). Over the last couple of months I have been getting pain of varying degrees in this area, and this is currently under investigation. Without wishing to jump the gun on diagnosis, a friend of mine (and fellow Chronic Fatigue Syndrome sufferer) has suggested that Irritable Bowell Syndrome and CFS are often associated. I simply do not have sufficient knowledge of the field to know this, but will ask my doctor, whom I am due to see this morning (I have just written a note to myself).
It is hard to be upbeat at this time in the morning, when you are feeling like shit. At least the headache has receded. However, I know from bitter experience that a price will be paid for this sleep deprivation. I am going to go to the gym again today, and am nervous about it. It's that paradox I mentioned in yesterday's post: do you work through the discomfort and risk crashing, or do you rest up and risk not breaking the cycle of exhaustion. I'm going for the former approach.
Journeys begin with...
... small steps.
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